Ahh, life’s journey to explore and define who we really are–I’m finding it never really ends. I’m finding that when you lean into it, if you’re willing, you really can discover something new about yourself everyday. I’m also finding that I also have a lot to learn…about myself.
It seems crazy because I should know everything about myself at this stage of the game–no, I’m not ready to reveal my age, but I feel like I should be more knowledgeable about every aspect of who I am.
Anyway, as much as I do this one thing, I never realized it was my love language until…well, until I realized it. I was trying to figure out what makes me feel loved when I realized that what I like to do to show how I feel isn’t necessarily what I need/want/look for in return.
I realized my love language to express how I feel for my loved ones is just giving. I love to give–whether it is a foot rub, a teddy bear, send a basket of fruit, I like to do things to show people they are in my thoughts and I love doing little things to take care of them.
The odd thing is, I don’t know if others doing things for me is what makes me feel loved in return. As I sit and contemplate it, maybe it is…
Lord knows I would love to open the door to a delivery man with a bouquet of Edible Arrangements (I love fresh fruit that I don’t have to prepare) or a case of my favorite water or a care package of some of my favorite things. Heck, I truly never thought about it, but maybe, through writing this piece, maybe I have discovered my desired love language.
Now I’m not saying it has to be lavish things, no not at all. What I am saying is I have realized that my love language is small tokens that show you are, not just thinking of me, but that you are paying attention.
A prime example is a Secret Santa holiday gift exchange I participated in a few years back.
I wasn’t so excited to receive gifts as I was excited to receive certain gifts. One gift I got was my favorite water and a Snicker bar. I was overjoyed with that gift. It couldn’t have cost more than $5, but it made my entire day. I was so happy that whomever my Secret Santa was, they knew so well what would make me happy.
Another time (a totally different secret santa), I received the cutest ramican bowl that was just large enough for me to have my daily packet of instant oatmeal at my desk and I think the person even bought me a box of my favorite oatmeal. It was uncanny to me. I never realized that someone could watch you so closely as to discover the little idiosyncrasies that you didn’t even realize you exhibited. It meant the world to me…and I guess I’m realizing now…it still does. That’s my love language…quality, not quantity; my love language is showing me that you pay attention to the little details. For me, it means you actually see me and isn’t that what we all want, in the end…to be seen?
So I pose the question to you…what is your love language?